Crock o' Crap

I've always maintained that cooking is a breeze and have never been able to understand why people say they can't cook. My sarcastic response is usually something along the lines of, "well, can you read?" Because, for the most part if you can read...you can cook. I also love crock pot meals because they are easy, breezy - just like Cover Girl makeup. HOWEVER, the other night I made a crock pot meal that was seriously icky-poo-poo. Here's a picture of it for your enjoyment:

Pretty bad, eh? I think the people who publish bad tasting crock pot meals should be forced to accept Fed-Ex packages of leftovers from cooks like me who fell into their trap by reading titles like, "Oriental Steak and Pea Pods" and listing ingredients like sirloin, rice, pineapple juice and teriyaki. To my family's credit, they actually ate this glumpy slop and said it wasn't too bad. It was high praise considering I once heard, "smells like low tide" after serving a seafood dish. Fortunately, it all just makes me lol.

Disclaimer: The above cook, heretofore known as 'ponytayl', may have had the crockpot turned on the high setting instead of the recommended low setting, resulting in her crock o' crap.

Earth Day Dumbness

I will fully admit, at the beginning of this post, that perhaps my Christian heart needs some balance when considering the care of our earth. I don't litter, but I also don't recycle. I'm not proud of the fact that I don't recycle, I'm just too lazy to do it. (I'm thankful I don't live in a state where they tell me I must do it, because I don't want the government in my garbage, thank you.) However, this notion of an 'Earth Day' and specifically last night's 'Earth Hour' from 8:30-9:00 is just too much. I happily turned my home's lights on during that hour as a rebellious "NO" to all things 'earthy'. I'm typically the one in my house that walks around and turns all of the lights off in the rooms we aren't in. I'd like to say that I do that to decrease my carbon footprint, but the truth is that I do it to decrease my electric bill. I actually do think that we should take care of the earth, but I also think that God's plan is going to come to fruition in HIS TIME whether we have a hole in the ozone or not. This is probably the crux of the problem for me. I see people who are preoccupied with saving the earth as being under the impression that we CAN save the earth, when the reality is that the earth...and everything in it...is in God's hands. Should we want to leave a beautiful planet for future generations? Of course. But we shouldn't be under the illusion that by 'being green' our world will last longer. Which is why I often see red when it comes to being green.

My Two Cents

oh my gosh! i was at the grocery store today using the last of my weekly grocery money. i had $48.91 to spend and when i rang up my groceries (in the u-scan lane that i love so much) my total came to (drum roll please.....) $48.93. i was like a little kid counting out my change and realizing that i might have the EXACT amount of money. the fact that i was off by two cents didn't dampen my experience too much. perhaps my life is just ultra dull these days, but i can't tell you how exciting that was for little pea-brained me!

Dr. Phil-ism

dr. phil never ceases to crack me up...and i needed a laugh today. he was talking to three young women who were each in a dysfunctial marriage. their individual issues are too numerous to mention. (one of the young women broke her husbands collarbone with the leg of a table, but to her credit admitted that she has sought help for her 'anger' issues.) anyway...here it comes...at one point in the conversation dr. phil says,

"if insight were lard the three of you couldn't grease a skillet."

classic. you go, dr. phil. up until today my favorite dr. phil-ism has been, "he'll just have to get glad in the same pants he got mad in." i still laugh about that one, and have repeated it more times than i can count.

hey, at least i'm not watching maury are-you-my-baby's-daddy povich.

a life lost

it's taken a week, but i am ready to talk about it.

ashley, a young woman who looked like she walked out of an abercrombie & fitch advertisement, came into withchild in late january for a pregnancy test. she was scared about the results having had a previous abortion and a subsequent tubal pregnancy. the results? positive. again. ashley took it hard, but having regretted her past abortion she seemed to be onboard for carrying the child to term. a week later she came into our offices for an ultrasound and together we watched her 10 week old baby tumble, kick and wave. i watched her face light up as she looked at the screen in amazement. i was thrilled to get one of the ultrasound pictures, and hung it on my fridge, like any expectant parent would do. no...i wasn't the parent, but i was so excited about this life that would come to fruition!

i found out last week that ashley aborted her baby. my heart is aching, still, for this life that is no more. an innocent party to destruction. my heart, through the anger, hurts for ashley as well. she made a life altering decision that she will live with for a lifetime. the first abortion may have been done in ignorance, but this abortion was with full knowledge for i watched her as she marveled at the life moving within her. ashley saw her baby's beating heart, spine, hands and feet. i still haven't been able to comprehend how she could see what she saw and make the decision she made. again.

does life begin at conception? yes. it is my hope that one day in heaven i will have the opportunity to meet this baby that i cherished from the beginning.

John in Guadalajara

I love this shot of John hanging out with a couple of furry friends in Guadalajara.




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He always seems to meet new animals when he travels. This is a shot of Ginger who he met in Alaska last summer. She had really bad paws so before he left he bought her little booties to wear. She doesn't have them on here, but she looked cute in her new little shoes.

monkeys 2, otters 1

i had a great time at the zoo today, even though it felt like it was 120 degrees outside. i had the foresight to wear a spaghetti strap tank under my see through blouse (smart me), which was good since i shed my blouse about 45 minutes into our zoo adventure. anyway, i digress. spending the day with my own lamb, mariah, was fantastic. i think we saw every animal on display and ooohhhed and aaahhhed all day long. considering my lifelong fascination with monkeys, it is no surprise that they were the highlight. the little 3 year old orangatang was ADORABLE. unfortunately the baboons, with their hemorroid butts, were as disturbing as ever. i find them fascinating to watch in a car-wreck kind of way. i also loved watching the flamingos (not that they were really doing anything). sometime in the near future i am going to google 'flamingo' and find out why they like to stand on one leg. it is puzzling to me, because their legs are sooooo spindly. it seems to me that standing on both would be a necessity, since one alone looks like the equivalent of a single toothpick holding up a cupcake. the big surprise of the day was the otter attraction. man, oh man, were they adorable, playful little things. now THERE is an animal that seems to be getting the most out of life! i'm thinking the flamingos should take a field trip and visit their neighbors the otters to find out how to really live it up. sorry i don't have any pictures to show for this fabulous day. even though i'm an adult i am going to lay the blame at the feet of mariah whom, when i asked if i should take the camera replied, "well, you could but then you'd need to carry it all day." instead i spent the day saying, "i wish i had my camera". maybe next time. :)

Chase...errrrrr

okay, so yesterday i got a notice in the mail that my chase credit card is going to raise my APR from 11.99% to 15.24%. gee thanks, chase! that was the bad news. the good news is that i got them before they got me and cut up my pretty little chase card last october. sadly, for chase...but happily for me i am paying it off next month a full month before they decided to stick it to me. despite my good fortune with my chase account it makes me so mad that these companies are feeding off the responsible people that are continuing to pay their bills. errrrrrrrrrr. one of my friends told me today that she got a notice from her bank that her APR was going to be raised 12 points!! these two aren't the only ones. when i called to ask target to lower the APR on that card they flat out told me, "not only are we not going to lower it for you...we are actually going to be raising it." hey, thanks for the notice!! it is now next in line to be cut, which i will do as soon as i get the official word.

i reiterate again how grateful i am that marie (and devin) shared their enthusiasm about dave ramsey's principles, that i cut cards last year, that i read his book, that i am using CASH and that because of these things i am one step ahead of these banks and credit card companies.

whew.

kansas

I'm home now and going through the usual, 'I miss Kansas-family' letdown that occurs everytime I leave. Of course coming home to my own family is wonderful, but I just wish I didn't have to leave my extended family who live so far away. I think the people in the 'old days' had it right when they had communities made up of families...sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, etc. There are very few people in my family that I wouldn't enjoy having around all of the time. Don't worry...if you're reading this blog you aren't one of them! ;)

This picture (above) is Addison sitting on a pretend bench at the park. She got such a kick out of pretending to sit on it.

Addison was probably watching Barney or Dora, two shows that she loves.

While in Kansas I stayed with Marie and Devin, but saw my sister every day. Yeah! I loved meeting my brand new grandniece, Ainsley, who was only 2 weeks old, and catching up with 2 1/2 year old, Addison. Ainsley is precious, especially when she sleeps and 'squeaks'. We thought it would be cute to nickname her 'Squeaky', but for people my age that brings up the inevitable comparison to the Manson co-hort Squeaky Fromme...so we don't want that.

Addison is a bright active little munchkin who is incredibly verbal and articulate for someone so young. She sings all the time, much like my Mariah. I was blown away when I heard her singing, Angels We Have Heard on High...including the 'in excelsis deo' part. Gee, I just learned that last year. Addison is precious with her sister and helps out all the time with diapers, wipes, binkies, etc. She also loved helping me bake cookies...and eating them!

Marie and Devin are an awesome team and welcomed me with open arms. Marie is one of the only people I know who likes to sit around and relax as much as I do. It must be in the Maszk gene pool...although my sister surely didn't receive the gene! Marie and I enjoyed our time watching American Idol and The Biggest Loser together. She and Cheryl were privileged to see me do my 'happy dance' with my sweat pants hitched up to my sagging boobs while I danced to one of my favorite contestants singing one of my favorite songs during the AI culling process. HEY...not many people have seen my happy dance show...and it WAS special. Marie threatened to take a video and post it to youtube. (It would be embarrassing, but frankly once you've walked through Mervyns with your dress tucked into your thong, doing a happy dance is mild.)

I shot these pictures while Marie was sleeping with Ainsley. They were both so tuckered out that they never even stirred despite the camera flash and multiple pictures.

Thanks for the memories Riley's and Teetsel's!